Once a warning, now a reminder

I may not see you
but God does.

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You cannot sit with me

I did not find a forever home in my past
the trauma however sometimes comes back
for an acknowledgement, eye contact
but I refuse to sit with it, to make small talk
I am done writing about it,
giving it my undivided attention, to bathe in it
sometimes I look at the moment
when I coughed up small parts of my soul and I think to myself

even in that moment I did not give up because of Allah

What a blessing

People are blessings too

She was a blessing for a young girl
the way you moved my heart
away from loneliness into love
you made me believe
that miracles do happen

You were the one and only gift
for so many lost souls
and I pray to God that
that He will bless you too
– I will be missing you

Family

Yes, I am from the diaspora
Yes, I am the girl from outside

BUT

Maybe I am becoming more aware of my own humanity
Maybe the loss of the one who birthed me makes me feel things more deeply
Maybe it is seeing my people express their pain through tears and poetry

Here I am in front of the screen
thousand of miles away
grieving with you all