They are my eyes

Perhaps it invited itself in when my soul got too tired to stand up. Now I am trying to regain my balance by living less in my head and spending more time with the living. I am trying but sometimes my humanity takes over,  I become so consumed by it that I am unable to open up my own eyes.  But my loved ones,  they see me even on the days when I am unable to look at my present or dream about a future.

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You cannot sit with me

I did not find a forever home in my past
the trauma however sometimes comes back
for an acknowledgement, eye contact
but I refuse to sit with it, to make small talk
I am done writing about it,
giving it my undivided attention, to bathe in it
sometimes I look at the moment
when I coughed up small parts of my soul and I think to myself

even in that moment I did not give up because of Allah